The following is cut for inconsequential school bullshit. Carry on if you wish.
Augh. I don't understand. Why is financial aid CONSTANTLY FUCKING UP?! I submitted the last document they needed to process my account over two weeks ago. Today I get a letter in my inbox telling me that all financial aid accounts have been rolled from pending to official. But I check my ledger and what do I see?
"NO PENDING FINANCIAL AID FOUND"
Which means either there's just some computer glitch fucking up my account, someone in the office got lazy, or they lost some of my documents and now I'm effing screwed.
I fucking hate this technical stuff. Especially when it means I have to collaborate with my parents (which I do until I'm twenty five. FML) because they are ragingly insensitive to time, which means EVERYTHING IS ALWAYS FUCKING LATE. I find this incredibly frustrating because I'm generally an impeccably prompt person. To the point that being late gives me anxiety hardcore, so my parents take their sweet old time submitting their part of the documents and I run around calling my mom everyday saying, "THEY'RE GOING TO TAKE AWAY MY MONEY HAVE YOU FAXED THAT SHIT TO THEM YET?!"
And now it seems all for naught, because I'm still going to have to march down to the fin aid office today in my high-heeled hooker boots and my all black outfit and STRAIGHTEN THIS CLUSTERFUCK OUT.
Pain in my motherfucking ass. The hoops they make you jump through in college, Jesus fuck. It's no wonder I put off going for four years. The real reason is I just didn't want to fuck with the paperwork.
People raise their eyebrows when I express my numerous irrational fears. And granted, many of them are HIGHLY irrational (I'm afraid of popping balloons and mousetraps, for example) but others....well I feel there's solid justification in some cases. My fear of swimming in open bodies of water for example...THIS IS WHY I DON'T SWIM IN ANYTHING BUT POOLS. WITH CHLORINE.
Shit. I think there's a class in here now. Must flee.
OH YEAH ALSO REMEMBER THAT BITCH
That bitch transferred into my Bio lab so now I have to LOOK AT HER STUPID FUCKING FACE AND HEAR HER AWFUL RACIST COMMENTS for another semester. Luckily, I think she's very aware, at this point that I really fucking don't like her (I described her as "my nemisis" to Ross the other day) and she avoids me and sits waaaay on the other side of the room.
AND SHE BETTER STAY THERE. I WILL BITE HER FUCKING LEG IF SHE COMES NEAR ME. RAAAAR.